layperson’s quick and easy guide to a trans friend coming out (as trans). not just for cis people ok.
change name and pronouns immediately you dongle no matter what your friend looks like or what their transition or identity is like its ok if you mess up because you’re not used to it or whatever but you gotta start tryin right away ok
that being said, dont swap your dang name and pronouns if youre not sure your friend is okay with it. you dont have to ask “WHO ELSE HAVE U TOLD” you can just say “Is it ok to call you alice around (mutual friend that we hang with a lot)?”
if you have questions don’t ask them, google them you planate dependent half this shit is on the internet and unless your friend specifically offers up a q&a session you can manage to find it somewhere on a website ok. theres even tags on tumblr.
and dont ask personal questions especially about genitals in the past present or future tense everyone always cares about genitals but theyre actually not important ok wow BELUGA
also if your friend is sayin stuff like “whatever works for you” and “go at your own pace” and shit, dont take advantage of their shy terror. its wicked scary coming out to someone, ok. no matter what and especially with gender. they might be afraid of freakin u out!!! use what they identify as, especially when you’re alone together. reinforce that you’re gonna be an acceptably decent being when it comes to their gender.
dont fuckin out them to people in pursuit of truth justice and the american way, god, dont tell your mom that childhood friend the lady now identifies as teenage friend the male and junk unless it’s ok with friend. ok. even if you need to tell someone why you give a shit about trans rights , dont, just say youre not a massive stale wanknut tonkler and you respect people
its not about you, even if youre trans too. respect ur friend’s boundaries and shit. also listen to them. but of course if you feel like they’re dumpin too much on you thats not your responsibility either tell them if you need to take a step away from their gender talk.
dont use fuckin gendered words!! i dont care if you call all your girl friends dude dont call your trans girl friend a dude ok that’s Rude. if she lets you know she doesnt fucking care thats DIFFERENT but really. and if your friend is nonbinary use goddamn neutral words.
thats basically most of it. as long as you listen to people you should be good, okay, chum
Day of Silence works ok for cissexual gays and lesbians who are otherwise very well-represented. Not so much for bi and trans people. When society already silences you, silencing yourself doesn’t do anything but cooperate.